An Open Letter to Hershey’s

Dear Hershey’s,
I was disgusted to read last week that you have threatened legal action against companies importing British Cadbury’s into the United States causing them to cease importing British chocolate. This is ridiculous; your Cadbury’s doesn’t taste like the real Cadbury’s, British people don’t buy it so you are not losing any sales. British people are not going to replace decent chocolate with something that tastes like vomit and leaves an awful aftertaste that a cough medicine manufacturer would be proud of. What’s more, we are not going to buy any of your other disgusting products to compensate. If you learnt how to make Cadbury’s properly it wouldn’t be as much of an issue; here’s a tip the main ingredient should be milk (the name is Dairy Milk, get it?) not sugar.

What’s even worse is that to add insult to injury you have banned other British chocolate too, including the British made Kit Kat. Apparently a Yorkie bar is too similar to a York Peppermint Patty (whatever the hell that is) and the Toffee Crisp is also banned from import because it has orange packaging just like Reese’s. Really?! Do you think consumers are that dumb? What next, are you going to ban mistletoe at Christmas because it infringes on those vile tasting lumps you call Hershey’s Kisses? Or are you going to ban stock cubes because you have now made yourselves a laughing stock? Congratulations on creating common ground between us and the Irish though, it took a few hundred years but Irish expats are pissed off about this too.

We Brits are a peaceful people; we like to form orderly queues, to talk things over with a cup of tea, to mutter under our breath rather than be confrontational. But banning our chocolate is a step too far. As a nation we like our chocolate (okay the Toffee Crisp is a bit crap but it’s better than most of your products) and we don’t like to be pushed around by a multinational company. I must confess I quite like your Reese’s and in the past I have bought Reese’s Ice Cream and peanut butter cups on a number of occasions. But here’s the deal: until you stop making legal threats to companies importing British chocolate I won’t touch any of your products and I know plenty of other expats who are going to be boycotting your products too. There are plenty of other chocolate manufacturers out there. Your ridiculous legal threats have already cost you sales.

A rather pissed off Brit.

Angry British and Irish Expats; you can find the contact details of Hershey’s and also details of a Petition here: